Happy Valentine’s Day from W. Alexander and family

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I’m not talking writing or books today. I’m talking love!

Hi, friends.

It’s no secret to anyone that Valentine’s Day is my favorite holiday. I love LOVE! I know I’m on an island here; your typical guy doesn’t think much about romance, but I live for it. This is my Super-bowl!

So, I want all the men to listen-up: Valentine’s Day is all about showing appreciation, and expressing adoration; it’s about gesture, about pulling a hard-stop against the busy circus of life in order to remind your partner why you still want them on this journey together, and it’s not about you. So, make this day a priority, and excuse my French: turn off that damn Xbox.

I’m not saying you have to be extravagant, but I am saying your partner deserves more than the bare minimum. Trust me, a good gesture goes further than diamonds and fancy dinners—a lot further, actually. This year, because of covid, it is difficult to pull off a real over-the-top moment, so why not do something unexpected for your partner. If you’re like my wife and I—stuck at home—then consider taking over the kids, or catching up all the laundry, or even turning off your phone and being present the whole day, etcetera. Just choose something that peels back your partner’s stress, and, this is very important, don’t point-it-out. Be proactive and give your partner the headspace they need to give you a special day, too. If you have been together awhile, then you should know what gesture would make your partner’s Valentine’s Day get off to a perfect start. Here’s an idea anyway:

Turn your partner on, by giving them the day off.

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Side Note: most men don’t realize they’d have a lot more sex in their lives if they were nicer to their wives. Like the saying goes, “no one wants to ride a stubborn horse.”

If, like me, covid has you home, it is even more vital you show your partner love. You might think, I don’t feel like I need to show it, or I hate that it is expected, or I show it everyday, etcetera. So, let me just stop you right there and tell you to get over yourself; swallow that toxic pride. You don’t have to be the quote-on-quote romantic type to give your partner a perfect Valentine’s Day. Just show them—by gesture—they matter to you. Valentine’s Day is about providing evidence of your affection. Not because it is in doubt, but because love is most felt when expressed. So, express it!

Love leaves a trail of evidence.

If you love someone, you show it not in your own way, but in theirs. Speak their love language, and they will speak yours. If you disagree, you're the horse.

—W. Alexander